Always Thinking...
Holidays
Author: Evvie

Here's a list of things I do to celebrate on certain days. I made this list mostly for my own enjoyment. At first I wasn't going to post it, but Always Thinking hasn't had any updates for a while, and maybe you'll enjoy these things too. Here it is.

January 01 Recovery Day/ New Year's Day: This is a day that you stay in bed as much as you can, taking aspirin and drinking water. Most likely you're in agony from drinking too much the previous night, a great way to start the year. If you didn't drink the day before, you have some catching up to do.

January 06 Day Of The Spins: By now you should be ready to get blitzed again, except this time you do it with your favorite beers. Go to the store and get some of each type of your favorite beer and get them home to be refrigerated. You can do this part the day before if you can trust yourself not to drink them. On the 6th, get some buds together and start drinking and smoking until you get the spins. Throw up everywhere.

January 17 Sharing The Load: Watch a sweet movie series one after the other, with few breaks.

February 09 Un-accomplishment Day: Today, get into whatever you wear to bed, get snack food and sit your ass down on the couch. Play video games and watch movies all damn day and accomplish nothing. Showering is optional. Consider inviting other people to join you in the evening, but if it takes too much effort, fuck the whole thing. Make sure you spend a good amount of time alone, and scratch yourself at least a few times, even if you're not itchy.

February 14 Primal Connection Day/ Valentine's Day: For men: Select your favorite bitch and buy her something she would like. Something small, like flowers or candy. Or both. Something cliché always works. Take her to dinner and a movie. If nothing good is playing that night go and rent one. Get her in your house and get her drunk. If you accomplish all this and can't bang her, use the next day to figure out if/why you're pathetic or is she's a nun. For women: Select your favorite bastard and buy him a case of beer. Get into your hottest lingerie, pick up the case of beer and when you see him offer to suck his dick, if he refuses and you don't bang, use the next day to figure out if you're fat or he's a fag.

February 16 Forced Family Day: Pay attention to your parents and siblings for a bit. Force yourself to do it, you gotta do it sometime this year so you might as well get it over with.

March 08 Cool Guys Day: Wear sunglasses all day and smoke.

March 17 St. Patrick's Day: Get wasted and wear green. Kiss Irish people. Pinch everyone who isn't wearing green on the ass. Try to hang out with as many orange haired people as you can manage.

March 20 Park's Day: Take a walk in as many parks as you can get to.

March 25 So High School In Spring: Throw a hotel party because your parents are lame and won't let you host it at home. BUT if you can find someone else to host it, by all means.

April 05 Coconut Day: Get a coconut and open it in a new and exciting way.

April 09 to 13 A Chocolaty Celebration/ Easter: On the ninth, up until the 12th, eat very healthily, exercise, and then on the 13th get the most chocolaty food item that you possibly can and then put a mars bar on it, wash it down with chocolate milk.

April 16 St. Eggies Day: Go buy all the discounted Easter candy, it'll be retardedly cheap.

April 20 420: YEAH 420! Do what ya do on 420, anything you end up doing will be fun, but I personally like to reserve a table at a buffet and be obnoxious.

May 01 Evvieco Celebration Times: As the legends go, if you tell people about the site http://evvieco.com your chances of sexual encounters increase with the amount of people you tell. You have a time limit ending when the great celebration takes place sometime after the 1st. The great celebration usually involves many pizzas and a keg of beer. It is shame upon you and your family if you miss it.

May 05 Cutiefest: As soon as you wake up go look at pictures of puppies, bunnies and kitties. Get really excited about ice cream! Make the main event of the day be going to a pet store and looking at baby animals.

May 18 Victoria Day: If you know anyone named Victoria, be a little nicer to them on this day.

Every Other Weekend In June. Body Destruction Month: Every other weekend in june, drink alcohol with friends. Be loud and obnoxious, and make stupid decisions. Go to bars you normally wouldn't go to. If you wake up one morning with a tattoo you don't remember getting, like on every sitcom ever, you win.

June 28 Billy Mays Moment Of Silence: Watch infomercials until 6am and cheers to Billy Mays.

July 1 Canada Day: Wear your dirtiest, cheapest clothing, preferably a T-shit that you got for free in a case of beer. Get some Max ice and colt 45s and a kiddy pool. Lounge in that pool and drink your 40s. Play hockey, or consider playing hockey at some point.

July 15 Ghost Bus Voyage: Do something psychedelic and chronicle it, or make some sort of art about it. Make sure to submit it to Psychonauts.

July 30 Redemption: Since you've no doubt been drunk nonstop the past two months, you may have put on some weight. On this holiday, get all of your sports equipment together in a pile and use it all. Eat some damn fruits and vegetables. Drink water.

August 03 Civic Holiday: Go for a late night drive, especially if you own a Honda Civic. Listen to some good music and stop off at a place far away that's open overnight.

August 15 Steakmeat Challenge: How much dead animal can you eat? Let's find out. Make Ted fuckin' Nugent proud. BBQ entire animals. Have everyone bring what they want Q'd.

August 22 Ramanzadan: Ramanza is what's for dinner tonight.

September 07 Blazing Bowels: Celebrate chili fries. Regret it.

September 14 Reading Rainbow: Visit a bookstore and get some books to read. Carry a book around with you all day. Read in every spare moment.

September 22 Alpha Goose Tribute: Find some geese or ducks and feed them.

September 25 So High School In Autumn : Throw a hotel party because your parents are lame and won't let you host it at home. BUT if you can find someone else to host it, by all means.

October 03 Casino Night Zone: Go to a casino and lose all your money. Consider committing suicide in the bathroom.

October 12 Thanksgiving: Apart from the normal celebration of stuffing yourself until you puke, there is a tradition of telling your family something about you that they don't want to hear. For instance; you're gay or you killed someone. This is also a good time to announce divorces or that you have cancer.

October 18 Mario Tapes: Go buy a bunch of old video games during the day, play them and then Make up a drinking game to go along with playing the old Mario Bros games. Play each one. If Mario's not your thing, do it with other games. Also, make sure you play a lot of your worst games while drunk. The next day, begin working on the Zelda of your choice.

October 22 Not Free Comic Book Day: Get yourself a lot of comics.

October 31 Candy Day/ Halloween: Eat candy. Dress up. Watch a scary movie. Get drunk. Make sure you don't give out any of the good candy, so that you have more for yourself.

November 1 Gazing Day: Have a fire and gaze at it. When it goes out, take a look at the stars. If the weather sucks just wait a few days. Bring a blanket to put on the grass.

November 11 Remembrance Day: It's fun to play with guns, go shoot off some rounds in honor of those poor saps that died for this way of life, and hope it was worth it. No gun? Get one. At least a BB gun.

November 27 Dubdubnacs: Get some Cognac, the expensive kind, and then get some Cognac Colts. Drink and smoke as if you were rich. Use your best glasses. Listen to classical music. Cross your legs and put your laptop on one knee, surf casually.

December 5 Country Fresh: (for 905 only) Go to Country Fresh and order one of everything you like from there.

December 21 Make Sure Snow Doesn't Suck All The Time: Have a snowball fight and go sledding. If there isn't enough snow, just put it off until there is. Involve beer.

December 31 First Blood New Years Eve: If you're not attending any party on New Years Eve for some reason, it's always sweet to stay up late and watch Rambo in bed.

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