Kill Them All

One line of products that someone needs to invent would be old people extermination tools. You know those little things you get to kill ants? We need some stuff like that to get rid of old people. I cooked up a few ideas to help who ever is going to take on the task of doing this most desired deed to society.


  1. Wheelchairs with wheels made of C4. When a disgusting wrinkly old hag sits in her wheel chair, it explodes creating a multiply array of old lady bits and pieces for the birds to eat. Then we don't have to worry about these old bags getting in our way feeding birds anymore.
  2. Wheelchair sidewalk spikes. You know those things that cops lay down on the roads in car chases? Yeah, we need some of those on the city sidewalks to pop the wheels on old peoples hover rounds, and then while they sit there defenceless, a nuclear weapon should be detonated in their face.
  3. Faulty wheelchair ramps. There should be a series of these. Some should be catapults disguised as wheel chair ramps, and launch those wrinkly fuckers into space, and others should just be trap doors over pits of spikes.
  4. New cars should not have breaks. Since the only ones who can afford new cars are useless old people, they should stop putting breaks in them. They should let those smelly diaper wearing assholes drive over a fucking cliff.
  5. No more vitamins, pension checks, stupid hats, wigs, dotted dresses, walkers, canes, or old folks housing, unless there is some sort of bomb attached to them.



















fuck every one but old people